What My Granny Taught Me About Joyful Living
We commemorated my Granny’s seventh anniversary at the weekend. I can hardly believe that seven years has already elapsed; seven years without the matriarch of our family. While we were arranging flowers – tulips, her favourite – and choosing joss paper, I got to thinking about everything that my Granny taught me without actually teaching me.
My Granny was a real force of a woman: widowed for more than 20 years, she was SO beloved by all of us. She had a penchant of M&S yum-yums, loved a Lucozade Original, took spontaneous tours around Hertfordshire with her senior bus pass, and ordered fresh fish and meat from the fishmongers and butchers in our local Tesco in loud Cantonese. In hindsight, much of my personal ethos and path through life is rooted in what I learned from Granny.
Did you know? My ever-popular Sundaze series began as an homage to the Sundays I’d spend at my Granny’s house. Together with my cousins and siblings, we’d spend hours there every weekend, catching up, sharing stories and having the best fun.
Moreover, my Granny taught me so much about embracing and prioritising joyful living.
Spending time on yourself is essential
As well as Granny’s little bus wanderings, I fondly recall her love for a weekly massage in the comfort of her own home. She was also partial to a 3pm tea break, where she’d make a pot of oolong tea and steam a custard bun or two. In short, she believed that spending time (and money) on yourself is essential. Her Tuesday afternoon massages were a non-negotiable: she’d never make plans with us on a Tuesday. Instead, Granny would invite us other throughout the week for little Granny-granddaughter dates on her own terms – often after she’d completed her weekly shop and freshly painted her nails. (Perhaps that’s the main lesson I learned from Granny…)
Don’t stress over the small things
As I gratefully get older, I’m realising how the little things can be important and unimportant. I write a fortnightly series capturing the little joys in my life, but equally am reminded that there’s no need to sweat the small stuff. I’d once pop to Granny’s after work and stress about the work I hadn’t quite completed that day, or how worried I was about an upcoming task, or share my struggles to keep friendships feeling like they looked online. And she’d always grab me a Mini Roll, pour me a cup of tea and talk about everything else. We’d ruminate about the milestones my then-baby cousin was reaching, talk about how exciting it was that my date actually picked me up from the doorstep (even lovelier that they are now my boyfriend!) and discuss which dishes she would cook for Sunday dinner.
Live in the moment
Aside from the infamous Sunday dinners and her Tuesday massage, Granny famously lived in the moment and rarely planned ahead. Of course, somebody later in life has far fewer commitments in the diary, but I think it’s a great outlook to have too.
What is truly important to carve time out for in the diary?
Is it what you’re doing, or who you’re seeing?
Silence can be golden too
Finally, on a funny note, my Granny taught me that silence can be golden too. Deep into our raucous Sundays, I’d spy her switching off her hearing aid and simply smiling as she watched us carry on carrying on. In a world that is incredibly busy, always-on and focused on always being entertained, it is also important to revel in silence once every so often.
Thank you for everything, Granny.
